From the Blog

德舒特河教会了我教学的艺术

by Adam Bunting

Picture of Deschutes River

亚当·邦廷是尚普兰山谷联合高中的客座博主和校长. You can find him on Twitter @abuntcvu. 本帖中的所有照片都是由Adam Bunting提供的.

那时我已经快40岁了,我以为自己的衰老是因为我在判断上犯了近乎灾难性的错误. 事实证明,傲慢和冲动是一生的伴侣.

The River

我们沿着德舒特河漂流的第二天早晨,气氛十分紧张. 怀特霍斯急流把我们和余下的旅程隔开了. 比如在一个特别有挑战性的滑雪坡道上选择一条线, 你必须在正确的时间入到正确的水里否则筏子就会被卡住或翻倒. Ejection is another risk, and while the Deschutes is relatively safe, there have been fatalities over the years.

我们划着筏子进入急流上方的可起降区,在西部地形上跳跃,这很适合火星任务. Crunching up the bank, my friend Ryan described an incident during his first year fishing in Colorado; this incident involved a failure to understand that poison ivy can grow on riverbanks and a subsequent week-long stay in a hospital with infusions of steroids to combat a full-body rash.

At the cliffs overlooking the class three rapids, 我们看到两艘船在我们的党外拍摄右中线. 我们了解到的是:赛艇运动员在落水后需要预料到一个旋转, hit a gap between two rocks, 然后沿着直线走完剩下的路.

丹和布洛克都是经验丰富的向导,他们负责划桨. The rest of us would hang on, four to a raft. 我刚通过莱恩认识布洛克, 从四年级开始,丹就一直是我们童年圈子里最好的朋友. Two years older, 他总是扮演哥哥的角色,因此,当他回顾安全说明时,你可以感受到他身上的紧张感:“如果你被甩了, feet first. Don’t try to swim. Float in your vest and guide yourself to an eddy. Think sledding. This is dangerous, guys. One raft at a time. 如果出了问题,其他人随时准备提供帮助.”

Dan’s raft went first. On it were Dave, Colin, and Mark: Dave because he was to be married in Washington in less than a week; Colin because he was the least experienced and also a new father; and Mark because, well, he balanced the other two. 丹打了第一杆,完美地打了旋转球,不到一分钟就穿过了急流.

他们把车停在路边,在几百码远的地方看着我们. Brock took a deep breath. “Here we go, boys!”

我们撞到了第一个落点,弹到了一块石头上,然后向最右边旋转. Low hanging branches rushed towards us. 我坐在筏子的尾部,筏子离海岸最近. I ducked a branch, slid toward the water, 紧紧抓住,让人想起几年前我在奥尔巴尼的一家潜水酒吧里经历的唯一一次机械骑牛. We rebounded to center stream; Brock rowed wildly, but with power, and we were finally through.

有时我在坐过山车或害怕的时候会有点歇斯底里地笑. 我不停地扔,直到我们把筏子拉到丹的筏子旁边.

The Stories

我们最后一划桨,在卵石滩上靠岸——我们的肩膀在河岸的安全地带放松下来,起伏以毫米计. We began to unload the raft, 享受这种友谊和简单的日常生活:把不透水的行李包扔到岸边, grab the coolers, lash the oars, stack the rods against a nearby tree, pitch the tents, spot a cook site, pull off sodden neoprene socks, set up lights and head lamps, and figure out where the latrine is (actually, that usually happens first).

由于湍急的水流,我们比往常早到了一点,并计划在卸下行李后再钓一会儿鱼. The fishing soon turned to sitting with our feet in the water; it was mid-afternoon and the temperatures were in the mid to high 90s. A couple of years later on a subsequent trip, 与鲍威尔湖100度的热风相比,我将学会享受这种相对凉爽的天气. 那些风使人想起《十大外围app》里的情景. 戴夫和我是唯一尝试侦察钓鱼洞的人, 但很快我们发现自己被这群人的玩笑吸引住了.

在经历了初中和高中,以及大学里必须参加的派对之后,我们尴尬地(也许有些迟了)看着彼此找到我们成年的自我, 几乎没有什么故事是没有被翻来覆去和不为人知的:有一次戴夫被停在路边,一群雪貂开着他的吉普车乱跑, or Colin’s ill fated first college interview; there was Dan’s British girlfriend who called him Don, and Mark’s infatuation with red Kool-Aid; there was the terrible and probably deadly home brew Ryan tried to distill in his backyard. So it went, on and on. And when we weren’t telling stories, we were talking about the river, the canyon walls, the arid landscape, and how hot it was. Strangely, we rarely talked about fishing. Instead, 我们争论着要花多长时间才能爬到峡谷壁后面的岩石尖顶,或者你是否真的能游到河对岸,以及水流会把你带到对岸多远的地方.

我指着河湾前的河岸说:“我能到那儿。.” I was met with a chorus of no ways and your brother probably could, but not you. 最后这句话引来了笑声和一连串的嘲笑,说我哥哥多么伟大——这又是一个多年来取笑我多么有竞争力的来源. 在15岁的时候,射门会非常接近目标,但在40岁的时候,我们都觉得这很有趣.

Image of Deschutes river, part 2.但这些嘲笑确实在我的脑海中引发了危险的思考. Could I actually swim across the river? 我的意思是,这片水域的宽度不可能超过40米. 我一直在进行铁人三项的训练,我是一个相当强壮的游泳运动员. 在湖里或海里游泳一英里并不遥远——也许会让人紧张,但并不难. 我思考的时间越长,我就越确信我能做到. 我记忆犹新的是丹讲述的他在科罗拉多当向导时的故事,在那里,你必须通过一个快速游泳测试. I wanted to know if I could do it. 然后一个更危险的想法出现在我的脑海里:好吧, if I attempted it in a life jacket, 我就会错过河对岸我想去的地方. I thought the life jacket was just an impediment.


All of a sudden, I was shedding my clothes. Then I jumped straight into the Deschutes.

The Swim

For a guy who lives in the eastern U.S.,没有什么比跳进西部鳟鱼河更好的了. 我皮肤上的干燥灰尘是任何戴隐形眼镜的人的诅咒——在一阵清凉的寒风中掉了下来.

在最初的几次划水中,我感觉自己很强壮,在水流中划水. I remembered to keep my face deep in the water, 每次划的时候都要转动我的头,这样就只有我的右眼和嘴角在水面上裂开了. 我呼吸了五口气,来到了河中央和湍急的河水中. It was here I paused to spot my progress, and in so doing, realized I had just made one of the biggest, most self-indulgent mistakes of my life.

我的脚从水面一落到低洼的水中,我就被拉到水面下了. 我挣扎着爬了起来,把脸伸出来,吸了一口气,然后又潜了下去. 时间变慢了,我的大脑突然变得超然,我想事情就是这样发生的. This is how people die in the Huntington Gorge. 我再次浮出水面,回头望着我的朋友们. 我看见科林坐在他的野营椅上,脚浸在水里. 我看到尸体开始沿着河岸爬来爬去,因为他们知道我有麻烦了. I went down and up again. I looked at the opposite shore. Could I make it? 水的力量像地心引力一样巨大,势不可挡. Then the worst thought struck me. 在佛蒙特州的家里,这一天是我女儿十岁生日的前一天. 这就是她将在这一天的周年纪念日带往下游的东西. 我对自己的愚蠢感到一种苦涩的失望——这个决定威胁着未来所有的决定.

我不知道我被困在上下循环的水里多久了. I’m sure it felt longer than it was in reality. 然后我听到一个很响的声音——很明显是丹的声音. He shouted one word that conveyed belief, pragmatic instruction, urgency, power, and a key to the cage of river and panic: “SWIM!”

My next thought was constructive. 我几乎带着幽默告诉自己:好吧,如果我要死在这里,那我也要死在尝试中. And with that simple instruction from Dan, I ripped one arm from the water, pulled and kicked, and freed my other arm. 划了三下后,我觉得自己好像从深深的泥里爬了出来. I was floating and swimming freely. In three more strokes, I was in shallow water. 再划一下,我就在我的脚所触过的最美味的砾石脚下刮来刮去. Lucky. Lucky. Lucky.

With All the Time That Now Remains

那天晚上,只有当我大声地向宇宙道歉并感谢我因傲慢而几乎失去的一切时,我才得以安息, carelessness, and ingratitude. It was in that reflective space, 透过帐篷顶上的网眼看着夜空, that I began to think about school and kids.

Whether in my role as principal or teacher, how many times, I wondered, 我是否曾为一个感觉自己身处湍急的水里,看着两岸的学生组织过一次会议, not sure which way to swim?

I began to play out that day on the Deschutes. What if, instead of yelling “SWIM!,” Dan had shouted, “Wait for us! We’re coming to save you?尽管岸上的意图是好的,但我该如何理解这个信息呢? 我是会听说你做不到还是说你自己没有能力脱身? Would I have survived?

我绕着多少学生绕了一圈, 承诺从安全的岸边解救出来, 同时保持他们所处的重力? 我有多少次为了拯救学生而削弱他们的能力? And what did I teach in those moments?

相反,我该如何表达对他们力量的信念呢? 怎样的话语,或没有话语,能给自己带来力量? Words that were active and pragmatic and hopeful. Words that said “SWIM!” Words that said, “You can do this.与此同时,还要准备岸上的绳索和木筏. 说了这么多,做了这么多,我怎么还会更好奇呢? 我怎么可能在峡谷壁和河床上寻找学校结构的曲线,它们为我们的学生创造了看不见的水流?

这些问题在过去六年里一直萦绕在我的脑海里, 我想我现在写这些只是因为它们在8月流行病学校回归之前特别有意义.

我们是否会忍不住教我们的孩子游回他们刚刚游过的、疫情前的海岸? How might we temper our anxious need to save, 相反,我们应该以一种隐藏着力量的好奇心和冷静的决心来接近我们的学生? 我们将如何利用这些开始的几周来邀请他们参与——而不是参与那些已经失去的事情——从而激发他们的力量, but in how they have grown during this pandemic?

最后,六年后,我想起了我的朋友丹,他正在癌症的激流中游泳. 我想起了他对我说的话,想起了他对我坚韧不拔的信心. 这是我一直铭记的一个词,并将继续以最深切的钦佩来反思这个词. 丹从未停止相信他有能力到达彼岸.

He taught that to me. I hope to teach it to my students.